Gus had learned early on that when lesbians gave you presents, you accepted them with a smile on your face. Gus hated inspirational messages, but the We Three Queens felt he tended to be a bit dour and needed daily affirmations. “That is probably the dumbest thing I’ve ever read,” Gus muttered. Gustavo (or Gus, as he preferred to be called because what the hell had Pastor Tommy been smoking the day he’d named his only child?) tore off the previous day’s meandering and read the 135th inspirational message of the year. But that wasn’t anything new he didn’t know how to broach many subjects at all. He didn’t know the proper way to broach the subject of either being related or in a threesome. He hadn’t worked up the courage yet to ask. On top of the drawers was a calendar advertised as having 365 DAYS OF INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES! EVERY DAY IS A NEW MESSAGE OF HOPE! It’d been given to him by the We Three Queens, the trio of elderly lesbians who were either sisters or in a polyamorous relationship.

He stood and looked down at the small chest of drawers next to his bed. Gustavo’s arms burned in a good way by the time he’d finished. I’m completely ripped and feel the need to disparage Hemingway as a pretentious hack.” Please bring me the coffee cake and the liter of orange Slice from the pantry. “God gave you that body, boy,” Pastor Tommy said.

Granted, Pastor Tommy wasn’t really a pastor and he’d been stoned out of his mind when he’d said it, but the point remained the same. Pastor Tommy had told him that a body was a temple and should be treated as such. He rolled out of bed and onto the floor and began the set of one hundred push-ups. He looked up at the ceiling and thought, Today is going to be an okay day. IT WAS seven in the morning when the alarm clock belonging to Gustavo Tiberius rang and he opened his eyes. You are exactly the way you’re supposed to be. You do you, and if anyone gives you grief for that, remember one thing: It’s also okay to be asexual, demisexual, pansexual, or aromantic.

Never, ever let anyone tell you that who you are is wrong. Suddenly wanting to be that someone, Gus steps out of his comfort zone and plans to become the most normal person ever. And maybe Gus is starting to think the same thing about Casey, even if Casey is obsessive about Instagramming his food.īut Gus isn’t normal and Casey deserves someone who can be. For some reason, Casey thinks Gus is the greatest thing ever. Until Casey, an asexual stoner hipster and the newest employee at Lottie’s Lattes, enters his life. His closest friends are a lady named Lottie with drag queen hair and a trio of elderly Vespa riders known as the We Three Queens. He owns a video rental store that no one goes to. He reads encyclopedias every night before bed. Everyone in his small town of Abby, Oregon, knows this.

How to Be a Normal Person by T.J. Klune